In the beginning

I am sure as I embark on this quest to join the millions who habitually splatter their souls on vitual media, I will devulge my past, but for now, just know that "Life for me ain't been no crystal stair." - Brother Hughes.

At present, I find myself struggling, fighting, making numerous decisions on a daily basis that end up in action of some sort. Some propel me, others lie in wait; some tear at my heart resulting in wounds that will never heal, while some.....in retrospect...I can see the Master's hand (His existence is vital - or I am undone). I often wonder about His gifts and His withholdings.

I have more days of accountability than wanted and few days of wandering. I am innately a wanderer, but bridled nevertheless. My body remains, but 'O' does my soul wander. (This freedom is vital - misunderstood, but vital - or I am undone).

Amidst the lullaby, lies my world of planning. White noise clams my inner need for presence, but there is presence....too much presence....White noise needed and, lavendar (halo smiles at lavendar, as if overtaken). There all comes to me. (This and the blessed rest is vital - or I am undone).

I carry a flower trying not to crush its petals, it blooms for me....can't forget to water it. It's thorn pricks me, hidden at the base of its stem. I bleed myself back into planning. Beautiful flower, it is fragrant for me, but I know many fragrances. This flower bears friut for me...If I don't gather it, it will rot on the ground. (Tending thie garden is vital - or I am undone).

Peace has a cry and a want that shows its head in deceit and by force. ( I must make time for peace, it is vital - or I am undone)

And last, is my heart, folded into myself, once upon myself, watching myself, misunderstanding myself. I hurt myself, I love myself, I nuture myself, I discipline myself, I pray for myself (I need the return of love from myself - it is vital - or I am undone)

I am presented to the world.